papercutters

while.   while.  while.

sickening, tiring.  

i don't really love math. 

it give me wrinkles forehead.

days are pretty boring, maybe its because of the hormones.

i don't really sure, but i feel disgusted.

hey, does anyone realize what is not right?

i just really can't be straight.

i'll swallow it, piece by piece.

its ok too be me, cause you never know.

people, they talk when they like, and they shut when they feel like.

haa, its sickening, but i know things will get better later.

i always know that.  :D

i love u guys.

thanks for being there, its hormones.

yup, that give this unpleasant feeling. 

i'll be okay, i know i always recover.  

manusia bermusim

payah lah aku rase, hidup nie, sume pun bermusim-musim.  

yeaa, macam tu lah manusia.

kau tawu kenape aku bicarekan nie?  

ye lah, sebab aku nampak, aku pun yakin juga dengan ideologi nie.

soal nye, setiap kali ade bah, manusie berubah.

aku bagi contoh mudah ye, soal tudung.

bile datang satu trend, tinggal satu trend.

macam sekarang, ariyani kn.  :D

tu lah, payah sungguh.

ye, memang lah aku tak nafi kan aku pun manusia, aku pun, bermusim.

tapi mungkin musim aku tak cecah tiga atau empat bulan.

aku cume seketike, aku tak same dengan umum.

aku selalu berbeze.

holding on

its almost two weeks now.  

hate to say, but i miss u seremban.

HAHAKH!

can deny, i laughed alot here, can deny there's so many pretty gals besides.

hey, this post meant to say that i'm strong enough.  kn?

but it sounded like i'm pleasing myself.

*sigh

its quite a day, its tiring, i'm sickening.

i cant lie, i hate it when it comes.

i hate something not okay with this body.

the pulse rate is lower.  

average should be 60 above i guess, but.

mine is below.  

it reach to 40, and its worrying.

hope i can recover, cause its frightening to feel like dying.

is not meant to be broken, but i'll say,

owh, suda meninggal kan rumah, mak, boyfie, dan kawan. : D

so not happy.

ok, lets get started.

untuk mak: sorry lh kalau2 cuti yang lalu sangat membebankan.

bagai2 karenah, bagai2 yang tentu hala.

haihh, macam lh budak kecik lagi saye nie kn?

HAHAHKH!

tapi, bersyukur, masih ada yang sabar. : D

mak, dengan ketiadaan saya disisi nie, jgn lh bimbang.

saye akan selalu ade, cume tidak lh kelihatan.

mak, jage lh diri selalu, makan lh dengan lahap nye.

mak, tidur lh dengan cukup nye

mak, bangun lh awal. : P

hehhekh!

yang paling terutama pade saye, tentu lh mak.  

i LOVE u mom. : D

untuk abang: cuti ini lelah bukan?

hati aku cukup rase begitu begini.

aku rindu saat aku kecil, kau maen kan muzik, untuk lena ku.

tapi aku suda besar, kau pun semakin dewase.

tidak apa lh, aku masih bisa berdiri tegak lagi.

untuk sebarang keterlanjuran, maaf kn lh.

hati hanya pedih fikir kn aku dimana.  

bialah, aku tak apa-apa.

untuk boyfie: tq.

suda banyak sabar dengan badan yang satu ini.

jangan lh kau bimbang, aku pergi bukan untuk bersuka-suka.

kau jage diri, jage lh aku sekali.

pasti nanti aku nak kn kau kaye dan berumah tangge. : P

HAHAHHAKH!  

dumb2!

untuk sipolan2: rindu pulak rase nye.

cuti nie, aku happy, aku jumpe kau sume. : D

aku tak lh sunyi, sebab kau sume ade.

aku rindu nak tengok bole lh!

kau sume, jage lh diri, kau sume, jangan lh noty.

HAHAHAHKH!

geli jah ayat aku bah!

nangti cuting kitang jumpang dang gelakng laging.  

so, this semester break is really challenging. HAHHAKH!

i think, i need them, so this post is publised.

everyone, i'm sory if u ever feel dissatisfied with me.  

I LOVE U ALL!  

* Wahh, cm artis. : D

one on four, i pick

susah tawu?  susah untuk kau paham kan aku.

situasi aku, aku tak punya yang sejantina, aku cume ade mereka.

sipolan-polan lah yang teman aku, sipolan-polan lah.

semua di sini, sunyi, sipolan-polan lah yang teman.

susah tawu kalau kau rase begitu.

aku ape daye, aku tak mampu, aku tak tamak.

aku pilih kau atau sipolan-polan?

aku tak nak memilih, tu perit.

sipolan, kau dah banyak ade, susah senang.

aku tumpang, aku gembire, aku sedih, semua aku rase.

kau tawu, aku gembire, kau ade.  :')

aku ape aje, aku tak punye saing sejantina.

aku cume berdakap dengan yang tentangan aku.

cube kau dengar ye sipolan, kau dah banyak ade.

aku nangis,

aku gembire,

merah tu aku, kuning tu sipolan.

even satu aku, 4 kau, tak ape, tetap tak ape.

aku sekejap je, aku tumpang je, tap aku dapat banyak.

aku suke gelak, sipolan tetap buat lawak.

aku akan rindu sipolan, percaye lah.

kalau boleh aku nak jadi kuning, aku tak nak selalu asing.

aku nak jadi biasa, tak selalu luar biasa.

aku nak macam tu lh aku kate.

hmm.

NEVER

ridiculously saying.  

i have no girlfriends.  *sigh

from a kiddo, home always been matters.

parting me from those girls at school.

sometimes, i regret it much.

why do i have to go there, its far, way too far from home.

hehh, it was ok, for while.

but as i grew bigger, i realized that im way far from peeps.

hey, i live in different area, and schooling at different part?

what lh.  *sigh

now as im getting bigger, and on my way to adult life, 

i found that distance has parted me.  goshh.

i always wanted this way.

i always wanted to be with girls.

where you can hang around and chill and chit chatting.

that glass is broken

i haven't seen u for almost two years, n i'm missing u.

dear, how could u leave me while i'm still a baby to myself?

hahh, u have save your life, and my dying to go over it.

life is hard, i can tell, cause i'm facing it now.

i've no wings, i lost one, its hard for me to fly now.

DAD, can u come back home?

i need u.

i haven't seen u, hear u, feel u, for quite a days.

i've been thinking, how it would be if you are here now.

i just can't face this, i'm alone, i feel so left out.

don't you know, it could be easier for me if you were around?

i can show u the best in me, i'm a uni student now.

i scored in finals, i've license now.

i can drive u anywhere, we could travel together.

_____ like we use to.

:'(

different city every nite

its been awhile since my last post.  

life is pretty fair to me.  argghhh, i couldn't bother much.

owh, through this, i've experience bundle of joy, and cry.

nahh, its nothing, its just emotions.

i've spent this whole semester break fully.

i enjoy days at stall, i enjoy having trip at genting.

owh, too much wasting, and too much spend.

but its ok, its worth it.

HHAHHAHHAHAKH!

*padahal kau ske boros.

ok, lost my words.  so, that's why, blogger never been my hobby.

its like its getting on my nerves, every time i write something.

yess, i love my family, friends and foes.  :D

formspring.me

TANYEEEEEE http://formspring.me/NNAR

berkurat-kurat

this junk, have been so left out.  aiyo, sory.  its not like a lot will be reading, but still, i write it just for personal satisfaction.  :D  *puas  oowh, bagaimana nk cerita?  yeah, tough week, with plenty of assignment, quizes, and tests.  pheww.  eh2, dat april fool was YEAY!  a big2 yeay.  and on that day, i had lots of eating thiny with the roomates.  woahh!  ok, i miss my home.  :|

hard

aku penat lah.  kau kate.  

aku diam, aku tak cakap ape2.  

aku sayang kan kau.  kau kate.  

aku angguk, aku tahu tu.  

aku tak nak pergi dari hidup kau.  

aku diam dan bergenang.  aku amek tangan kau, dan genggam.  terima kasih.  aku bisik.

kau diam dan kau titis kan air mata. 

TERIMA KASIH, itu je lah yang aku cakap satu hari tu.

and i guess, its only you.  i've said it before.

mati kau mati, pergi kau pergi

its been so long, yet too earlier to be said.  hello.  

ok, im down, totally, sebab ape yang aku kenal, ape yang aku tawu.

owhhhh.  lelah aku, hancur aku.  kau tak same lagi.

 untuk sekian kali, aku cube lagi untuk paham kau, cube lagi.

yess, you've been a very bad gal.  a very very bad gal.

but as you said, once you killed a cow, u have to make a burger.  :|

dapat tawu yang kau yang aku kenal dulu dah tak same lagi, sikit sakit.

ini KAU

as you fade with the fact, that you are no longer bloom.

you, use to be the pretty2 gal that i wanted to be, the good one.

and yess, now you are just the same as this dead rose.

haihh, ape boleh aku kate lagi andai kau pilih untuk jadi ini.

aku betul2, betul, betul, harap kau masih same.

ku berdoa ke atas nya, moga kau pulih semula.  

(ciloq sket lyric the times :P)
 

when there is still times, when there is still days, when there is still weeks.  just realise.  

that  your life and your future is a dream.  

dream of truly good parent, dream of a mother, and a father.

bile kau persoal kan aku, kau boleh, kau tak perlu jadi macam aku.

ok, kau bosan hidup kau ditentukan yaa?  kau tak nak.

aku nak kau tawu, kau mampu jadi ape yang kau nak.

aku tawu kau masih remaje, punye darah mude.

ya, ya, ya.  aku pun mude, bukan kau saje.

eh, tolong lh, tolong diri sendiri bulehh?

you may say that im a total stalker, im a total fucker.

you annoyed by me, or and so, and so.  
but its for your own sake, i love you.  :|

you turn out to be pretty bitch now, you lost your identity.

you turn out to be with a beast now, that not comes in our fairytale stories.

you turn out to be slutty, and yaa!  i adore you!  
HAAHAHAHKH!  should i lough now?

or should i pity you?  ahh, suggestion please?

ermm try, try to look at yourself in the mirror, and guess what you will see?

a DEAD FLOWER.

BABABA, BYE.